The Herald Sun is reporting that an increasing number of private schools are getting strict on what counts as a satisfactory style, with some banning popular styles such as dreadlocks, fades, and tracks, as well as products like hair gel or mousse. 

Some schools are even going as far as banning boys wearing hair accessories, ties, and sideburns that go below the earlobes. Some are even sending the boys home if they break the rules (which to be honest, might not be the punishment the schools think it is…)

Still, private schools like Northside Christian College, Brighton Grammar and Oxley Christian College have decreed that all boys’ bobs must not be shorter than a No. 3, so get set to say bye-bye to buzzcuts.

Some parents however, are outraged, arguing their kids’ cuts are an expression of their personality, and that haircut policies are outdated. One parent told the Herald Sun: “If a teenager is made to feel their appearance is not OK, or they are forced to start shaving before they’re ready, or a forced haircut makes them feel ugly, what does that do to their already delicate self-confidence?”

Despite parental pleadings, the schools have defended their razor-cut rulings.

Marcellin College acting principal Nick Moloney argued the school was proud of its high standards, saying “These standards are made clear to all prospective families through an interview process, and further in our enrolment documents that are signed and agreed to by all parents or carers”.

The forgotten victims in all this hair-based hubbub? The hairdressers themselves.

Melbourne-based barber Justin Ristevski pointed out that teenage boys are often requesting specific cuts to copy their sporting idols, like Collingwood’s Nick Daicos, arguing “I’m not sure how their hair affects their learning.”

Still, while Daicos might be a great footballer, we’re also not totally sure he’s a member of MENSA…