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The Five Kinds Of Relationship Between Cats And Their Owners

Always wondered what kind of relationship you have with your cat? No? Oh, well, then never mind. Actually, no, wait, come back, you might still be interested in this.

Scientists have been hard at work and they’ve determined that cat/human relationships come in five different styles. Researchers over at the University of Lincoln did a poll of nearly 4,000 cat owners about their cats' behaviours.

The relationship types we most associate with cats would be either Complete Disinterest, Open Hostility, and Seeking Your Approval Through The Presentation Of Dead Native Wildlife, but apparently none of those are real relationship types.

The five real ones include Co-Dependent Relationship, which is where you and the cat are good pals, you might even consider each other family. You play regularly with your cat, but the problem is the cat doesn’t really relate well with others. It loves you alone, because it knows when you’re nearby it’s going to have a good time. There’s probably a treat or a pat headed its way. This type of relationship is common in one-person households.

The cat on the mat should have been the sequel to the cat in the hat. Missed opportunity by Dr Seuss. Image: Getty.

There’s also the more Casual Relationship – which is where the cat prefers life outdoors. If they had the ability to read and receive messages they’d probably leave you for a day or two. These types of cats are likely to visit several homes in their territory. They’re popping down to Doris at the end of the street for an earlier dinner and dropping by to see if you’ve got a can ready to go for a cheeky second dinner as well.

Going fur a drive. Hang onto your hat. And your cat. Image: Getty.

If you are emotionally invested in your cat and often play with them, and your cat is warm and friendly back to you, you’ve got yourself a Friendship. Unlike the Co-Dependent Relationship, any cat involved in a Friendship is also perfectly happy to be around other people, and doesn’t need to cling to its owner at all times.

High-five if you're pawsome! Image: Getty.

It turns out that cats and humans can also have Open Relationships. An Open Relationship with a cat is where the cat is an independent animal who likes having access to the outside. If you’re in an Open Relationship with your cat they’re unlikely to sit on your lap. No word on whether the Open Relationship falls apart because it turns out the whole thing was just an excuse made up by the cat so they could get extra pats from whoever they wanted.

If you're in an open relationship with your cat be prepared for it to look elsewhere. Image: Getty.

The fifth and final type of cat/human relationship is the Remote Relationship. You may as well not be in a relationship with this cat at all. The cat is cared for but they like to maintain a distance from the owner. The sort of cat/human relationship that would be maintained via long distance Skype calls if cats were able to do such a thing.

Not sure which cat-egory this relationship falls into but please look at the cat's face and bloody stop it. Image: Getty.

So what kind of relationship do you have with your cat? There is still a strong possibility that there’s a sixth category called Trickery, where the cat doesn’t like you much at all but knows if it pretends to like you, you’ll give it food. But scientists haven’t confirmed that one.