In his bid for the top job, he poisoned people who got in his way. Lives have been risked. How has he managed to get away with it? With a little Ryan Gosling-esque ‘Hey Girl.’

“Hey girl, I made you a tea. I hear tea mends bridges burnt by lies, character assassination and serious manipulation. I even let it steep for 5 minutes, just the way you like it.”

“Hey girl, remember that time I screwed with your mind and you ran me over? What amazing times we shared.”

“Hey girl, you make teaching science fulfilling. Cells and conscious thought, etc. You’re going to be a great nurse. You’re exceptional. Do my bidding.”

“Hey boy, you really know your way around an engine. Who knew the principal’s grandson would be an exceptional mechanic? You should drop out of high school. To follow your dreams, of course.”

“Hey girl, you’re an amazing principal. Exceptional. Will you be my mentor? Help me take your job.”

“Hey girl, you won’t tell anyone about my aneurism, will you? I’m just trying to live my life to the fullest, cherish what moments I have left, become school principal before I die. You understand.”

“Hey girl, you’re the love of my life, tell me what you know about the school principal.”

“Hey girl, can you say – Principal Poison pinches Piper’s pills?”

“Hey girl, is this a peel-off name plate?”

“Hey girl, I bought jewellery for your birthday. It’s not inappropriate if no one knows.”

“Hey girl, I’ll be filling in the position of principal while you’re sick. Keep taking those vitamin pills.”


“Hey girl, don’t strike, I’m the principal. Hmm, I think I bought the wrong student jewellery."
