Being the digital broadcaster of Limitless in Australia, we at The Insider would be the obvious first choice to test the drug. Here’s ten things we would do:
1. Make the perfect sandwich
From the Earl of Sandwich in the 1700s to Jamie Oliver in the present day, mankind has struggled to create the perfect combination of bread, fillings and condiments. Crust or no crust? Salami or ham? Simple like the humble ham and cheese or complex like the mighty club? NZT will fuel this culinary quest.
2. Achieve a perfect score in Family Feud
Imagine the crowd roaring. The bells ringing. Grant Denyer’s glorious smile beaming at you as he mouths the words ‘You’re the best.’ Survey says: dream come true.
3. Finally understand modern art
Ever been to an art gallery, looked at some Rothko abstract expressionist squares and thought “Huh?” Pop some NZT, return to the gallery and feel the tears well in your eyes as you appreciate all the esoteric complexities and nuances of contemporary art.
4. Formulate the perfect Bachelorette Bro Code
The greatest bros Australia has ever seen tried to produce a working version of The Bro Code on the Bachelorette and it nearly destroyed them. With NZT you could complete the sequence gaps to formulate a code so harmonious that all Bachelors would become one. This bro-gularity resulting in a testosterone source so pure, so potent, it could end the energy crisis. Bro for all and all for bros.
5. Predict who will win the Bachelorette
Everyone from government ministers to bookies is weighing up who will win Sam Frost’s heart. Dominate every water cooler discussion by analysing the psychologies of the contestants and accurately divining who will be Sam’s squeeze.
6. Learn every language
How can just one language communicate all the complex ideas in your newly-efficient brain? Naturellement, c’est pas possible. Verwenden Sie Ihr Gehirn, um alles zu verstehen. See? If you had just had your NZT hit you would’ve understood all that (or if you used Google translate).
7. Get a cameo on Scorpion
All up and coming pointdexters eventually gravitate towards Walter O’Brien, the hunkiest and spunkiest genius of them all. Celebrate your newfound geniushood by solving (fictional) crime with the best of them. Don’t let it get to your head.
8. Start your dream company
Every idea you’ve ever had is now accessible. Think of the business possibilities! You can finally build your brilliant invention, ride the wave of investments from every Shark in the business and watch your company soar. You always knew that mustard gun was a good idea.
9. Learn every musical instrument, host sell-out tours
Who hasn’t dreamt of headlining a sold-out gig, their name up in lights? Who hasn’t dreamt of rocking out with a guitar, clarinet, contrabassoon, recorder, or whatever suits the moment? NZT gives you improved motor skills, enhanced memory, and intense focus. Becoming the world’s best one-person band should be a cinch.
10. Become president of the world, achieve world peace
This one’s a bit of a toughie. First you need to unite the disparate states of the world, forge long-lasting relationships between irreconcilable groups, then you’ll need to become elected by the newly formed shaky global government and then ban warfare forever. A big ask, but with NZT you can climb any mountain!